I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
