If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
