cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize