i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize