If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
