when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
