Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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