Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!

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(806): View more from Texas

Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients

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(503): View more from Oregon

I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(404): View more from Georgia

he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts

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(813): View more from Florida

Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.

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(586): View more from Michigan

I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.

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