I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Sext me about skeletons
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
