Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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