I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Randomize
