come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
