Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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