Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
you win again, gameday.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
