Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
