i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
ugly people sure do ruin things
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
