they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
