Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Randomize
