So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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