Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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