all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
