Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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