Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
