I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
