Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
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We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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