Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
accomplished twins. life is a go
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
