I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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