So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Randomize
