She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize