Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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