just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I CAN MOONWALK!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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