I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize