Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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