Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize