Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i will never coherently bang her
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
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