The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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