I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
