The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
