i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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