nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
