dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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