This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
So vagazzling was a success
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize