That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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