he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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