one two three fourrrrnication!
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
