New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him