Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
