ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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