in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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