no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
