Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
