I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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